i think it is quite possible that i am the coldest person alive right now... anyway, yeah, this is basically the only free time i've had in about 3 days. dance, dance, dance. i was megastressed yesterday because i found out i had 3 tests tomorrow (thursday). and the tests are geometry, chemistry, and french. i almost cried in health. i just wasn't doing well. at all.

that night was cheri's dance. i skipped ballet so i'm going to jazz tonight... we're just running through the dance and the ballet and jazz dances are the same, so it'll be fine. but i'm so tired and freaking SORE. i'm so proud of cheri's dance because i'm one of three high school students doing it, and i also learn completely differently from the way she teaches. emily got mad last night because she was doing one thing wrong and i was doing it right, and at first she REALLY thought she was right, so we ended up redoing it about 15 times, and it turns out i'd been doing it right all along. haaaaaaa haaaaaaaa. haha, no, i wasn't like that.

today i had a study hall so i studied geometry and chemistry. AND our french test got moved to friday. i feel sooooooo much better. and improv today was lovely. jonjonjonjonjon. haha. he's honestly one of those people that never fails to make me ridiculously happy. almost giddy. we were like... messing around and stuff. haha. it was fun. and improv was really good today. and i'm so cold that i can't type anymore. i have sooooo much going on this week but i'll just update about that when it happens.

xoxo



05 December 2005, 4:06 PM

lookin' for someone to rave about you
♪: the postal service - such great heights

ah, sorry. let's see... friday there was a CRAPLOAD of snow. they were complete idiots not to have a 2-hour delay or send us home early. the principal came on the loudspeaker about 7th period and said "please excuse the interruption... does anyone else feel like they're living in a snow globe today?" haha. he said more, but it would've been hilarious if he'd left it like that. so yeah, that night i stayed home and did absolutely nothing. i was tired and i didn't want to deal with the snow.

saturday i had teresa, alicia, melissa, whitney, and julia (for a little bit) over to watch movies. we watched a little of the green day dvd, and billie joe armstrong's sexiness went up about 10 million times for me. ohgod, i have it baaaaaaaad. haha. we also watched hitchhiker's guide to the galaxy and garden state. my eyes were like permanently teared up after garden state. *sigh* i love it so much. and i really missed hanging out with that group of people so i was happy. and we had fun. haha.

sunday my family went christmas tree shopping. our tree is really cute. haha, it was fun. as soon as i got back leah called me and asked if i could be at dance in like... 5 minutes. um, no. nobody had told me that we were rehearsing for cookies and milk. unlike some of them, i have to be told at least a couple of hours before i'm going to do something! *sigh* so yeah... went there and was in a terrible mood. i just felt like shit and i really needed to cry. and i couldn't. we had a break in between dances and leah and i walked up to the MCT to see some people auditioning for rumplestiltskin. that cheered me up a lot. rachel and stephanie are sharing the lead role of the princess. it was amazing because after we left i said "ahh, i want BOTH rachel and stephanie to be the princess!!" haha. so yeah. it's awesome.

and last night was also our first tech for cheri's. i'm sure it looks amazing. and i'm really excited to have tech all this week... even though it and the show sort of killed my social life for this weekend. *sigh* but ish okay.

i think that's it.

xoxo



01 December 2005, 9:33 PM

you may tire of me
♪: modest mouse - tiny cities made of ash

frederick mascherino, leave your wife and marry me because you are the sweetest thing in the world.

ugggghhhh. i feel like shit right now. i actually had a pretty good day. i was freezing all day. i just could not get warm... i did get warm after gym class, obviously. olivia and i are 2 and 1... we whooped aj. it was so freaking funny. i really think he's on drugs. actually, i'm pretty sure he's told me he smokes pot. but i don't care; i would never really hang out with him outside of school anyway, and he's still pretty cool. but anyway... i'm getting really sick of chemistry. we didn't play in band and i had my knitting and my ipod. it was heaven, except that there was a draft.

jon is cute. i was out by the buses in our little clump and i turn and he's right up close to me with like wide eyes. i screamed a little. haha, it was so cute. he makes me happy. ok, i feel a little better now thinking about that.

soooo i just went to dance. modern. positives first: our dance is finished and it's really awesome. ok, so basically i miss dan like you would not believe. i don't think anyone understands. so emily goes to the bathroom and comes back and says, all calmly, "i just saw dan. he said pop in and say hi if you had time." my jaw kind of dropped and then i started spazzing. i go to say hi and the door is closed and there's loud music and lots of people and i didn't want to bother them. and emily's freaking FLIPPING OUT ON ME and acting all offended cause i'm making a big deal out of it. so i got quiet. and then... i basically had an anxiety attack. i have no idea what happened. but basically my heart was pouding really fast and my stomach was all tight and i couldn't breathe. liz said i turned blue. so i got a drink and went to the bathroom. sat down for awhile. calme down. it was SO EFFING WEIRD. i'm better now, physically, but we DID see dan for about 10 seconds... it almost made me feel worse than if i hadn't seen him at all. it was like a tease.. he invited us (although he was looking only at me) to stay and watch rehearsal (that's why he was there) and he would give us a ride home, but the boy doesn't always use common sense... there was no way to inform my mother, and stuff. so yeah.. we left. and i felt awful. and we're going to miss each other's concerts cause they conflict, so i have no idea when the hell i'm going to see him. *SIGH* i feel really stupid now for letting this get to me.

and then i got to thinking. i have nothing to look forward to. dance performances, yes, but i don't know what i'm doing this weekend. and i don't want to go to school tomorrow. i HATE having nothing to look forward to. maybe movie night with teresa, alicia, whitney and julia if we have time to organize it... or something... yeah, that would make me happy. i've been wanting to do that. :)

fucking december.

xoxo



30 November 2005, 7:02 PM

all the stars and boulevards aren't close enough for you
♪: semisonic - closing time

right now i am bored-ish (ish because i have dance in about 20 minutes), sleepy, missing dan (yeah, i said it... as much as i've been trying to hide it) and waiting for ljsecret to be updated. haha.

so today was school. umm... i can't think of anything exciting. haha. seriously, nothing. rachel and i were being goofy in chemistry. which isn't so bad. i knitted in study hall. i'm knitting like a maniac. we played in band and i SUCKED. i can NOT forget to practice over christmas break. i also just found out that our notes for english are due next wednesday and we're not going to the library anymore. *sigh* which means i had to print out all of my articles, which wasn't actually too bad.

improv... was lovely... it was a really good day. i was moving & jumping a lot and stuff. i really feel like dancing lately. beforehand jon was playing guitar, as usual (god, does he ever think about anything else?!), and i was half-listening to my ipod. (beginning my quest... for more info, i give you matt rubano.) i go, "jon, you sound lovely on top of death cab, but frankly i'd rather listen to you right now." haha. and yeah, dance was good.

afterword i went to look for some history day info with juila, but i really can't find ANYTHING. i'm finding some background info, but nothing on what i want. so i don't know what i'm going to do.

well, i'm off to read ljsecret and then go to dance.

xoxo



29 November 2005, 8:56 PM

just tie the rope
♪: rent - la vie boheme b

i suck at updating... and then days go by and i don't want to take the time to think of everything i haven't talked about...

thanksgiving dinner was pretty damn average, honestly. i was focused on my knitting the entire time, and i feel bad about that, but it's okay. mary and denise are both pregnant. babies r us, right? haha. i can tell denise is really excited but i'm worried about mary... she's already got one baby and works all day at the hospital like an hour away. nobody really knows how she does it. but yeah... i had some of everything except the meats and stuffing, but i didn't get really full or anything. hm.

sunday i did ABSOLUTELY NOTHING. seriously. chris called me to go to rent but my mom wanted me to stay home for some reason. it was kind of okay because, you know, energy breeds energy, so therefore the opposite is true. meaning if you don't do anything all day, you just get more and more lazy, you know?

monday it was REALLY nice outside so i went for a walk with emily and we went to the playground. hehe. i wished i had my camera. many photo ops. also that day one of the mailmen my dad knew really well and liked a lot just randomly dropped dead on his route. it's fucking scary. and really, really sad. nobody really knows what happened but everyone's a mess... his wife, and the kids on his route, and stuff. so sad. he was a really great guy. i'm kind of shaken up and so is my dad. and i'm also pissed because the post office is LITERALLY working these people to death. and no, i'm not using that as an excuse. you should hear some of the stories my dad tells, and see how hard he works. RIP, greg. *sigh*

last night i also had cheri's dance. it's really coming together and i'm freaking EXCITED. our costumes are pretty sexy too.

today was the first day back to school... it was actually a pretty easy day, if a bit boring. and i wasn't exhausted because i'd made up a lot of sleep over break :) we painted in jill's room... yeah.. haha.

and tonight i had dance. liz was getting a little annoyed with me, sherri, steph and kelsey (the 4 older girls) cause we talk and goof off a lot... but it was ok. i still don't like our ballet dance. but i think it'll be alright.

yeah, i think that's it.

xoxo